The word is on the tip of his tongue, forever, and the only reason he manages to keep himself from saying it is because once they're inside the store, Joel's nudging him back against the door. He closes his eyes and relaxes into the kiss, though his mind is keeps turning that one word over again and again because yes, that's how long Spencer wants Joel to be in his life. The notion that he could possibly want anyone else after discovering that such a thing as what he and Joel have exists is laughable, and he just barely manage to suppress a titter as he invites Joel's tongue into his mouth. There's no going back now, not that he'd ever want to, because he can't think of anyone who doesn't pale in comparison to his boyfriend, his beautiful and kind and sensitive and smart and caring boyfriend who Spencer knows tries so hard to be good to him. Joel exceeds expectations in that regard, in every regard, and Spencer's biggest regret is that he hasn't yet been able to find the right words to explain to Joel just how much of an impact he's had on Spencer's life.
It doesn't necessarily need to be said, he thinks, it's a shared understanding that Spencer can find in the way Joel looks at him; but even so, he's not going to stop trying. He wants Joel to hear it from his own mouth, wants Joel to be certain about how deeply Spencer's feelings for him run. So forever is apt, he thinks, because that's exactly how long he wants to spend with Joel. Forever, always, the rest of his life, however he puts it, the answer is the same. He'll never find this again, and he's going to hold onto it for as long as Joel is happy to stick around.
Once Joel pulls back from the kiss, Spencer ducks his head to hide his pleased smile before taking in a long whiff of the amazing smells wafting from the apartment upstairs. He cocks his head at Joel, bouncing on his heels as he reaches out to take Joel's hand. "Every good thing including that shepherd's pie?" he asks playfully, and it isn't his intention to brush past what Joel has said. He isn't actively trying to ignore the sweet words that warm his chest and make his heart beat a little faster, but he thinks that if he gets started on how much he thinks Joel is the one who truly deserves all the good things Spencer isn't sure he's giving enough of, he won't be able to stop. There's too long a list of reasons why Joel means so much to him, and he'd happily name all of them if his boyfriend ever asked--though Spencer doesn't imagine that will ever be the case--but for right now, he settles for another kiss before pulling Joel along with him to the stairs.
Still, as he starts to climb the stairs, he feels the need to say something, anything to give Joel a hint of the things that have been running through his mind since they'd entered the store. "For the record," he says, smiling affectionately at Joel over his shoulder, "I'll never want to stop letting you."
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Date: 2014-07-10 01:04 pm (UTC)It doesn't necessarily need to be said, he thinks, it's a shared understanding that Spencer can find in the way Joel looks at him; but even so, he's not going to stop trying. He wants Joel to hear it from his own mouth, wants Joel to be certain about how deeply Spencer's feelings for him run. So forever is apt, he thinks, because that's exactly how long he wants to spend with Joel. Forever, always, the rest of his life, however he puts it, the answer is the same. He'll never find this again, and he's going to hold onto it for as long as Joel is happy to stick around.
Once Joel pulls back from the kiss, Spencer ducks his head to hide his pleased smile before taking in a long whiff of the amazing smells wafting from the apartment upstairs. He cocks his head at Joel, bouncing on his heels as he reaches out to take Joel's hand. "Every good thing including that shepherd's pie?" he asks playfully, and it isn't his intention to brush past what Joel has said. He isn't actively trying to ignore the sweet words that warm his chest and make his heart beat a little faster, but he thinks that if he gets started on how much he thinks Joel is the one who truly deserves all the good things Spencer isn't sure he's giving enough of, he won't be able to stop. There's too long a list of reasons why Joel means so much to him, and he'd happily name all of them if his boyfriend ever asked--though Spencer doesn't imagine that will ever be the case--but for right now, he settles for another kiss before pulling Joel along with him to the stairs.
Still, as he starts to climb the stairs, he feels the need to say something, anything to give Joel a hint of the things that have been running through his mind since they'd entered the store. "For the record," he says, smiling affectionately at Joel over his shoulder, "I'll never want to stop letting you."