Spencer can hear it, the battle in Joel's mind over whether looking at him like this is right or wrong, and thought it comes with a flicker of guilt, it puts him the slightest bit more at ease. It's not that he wants Joel to worry over this, he doesn't, but until he can stop worrying about it himself, there's something soothing about knowing that his husband only wants to do what makes Spencer comfortable. He catches, too, the thought that Joel wouldn't want him to believe he prefers him this way and for that second, Spencer allows himself to appreciate the fact that he's been given the power to read minds. He hasn't wanted it up until now, hasn't been interested in invading other people's thoughts like that because while for the most part, he hasn't heard much that's been especially bothersome, there have been some that have made him uneasy.
He'd meant to tell Joel about the person in the grocery store who'd looked right at him, whose thoughts Spencer had managed to single out because it had been just one word--murderer--before the rest had flooded back in again, but there never seems to be a right time to talk about something like that. It's not even as if Spencer had been surprised that people still think that about him, he knows they do, but to hear is so clearly as if it really had been said out loud had been a jarring experience, and it had made him that much more eager to rid himself of this power.
Right now, though, he's finding that he's glad for it. When this is over--if it ever ends, that is--Spencer will be more than happy to go back to the ordinary man he'd been, the one whose greatest power is rooted in how vehemently he loves his husband, but until then, it helps him relax to know that Joel both wants to touch him but isn't quite sure he'd allowed. He is allowed, of course he is, and in spite of the fact that Spencer doesn't exactly know what to do with the lack of anything between his legs, he thinks he has an idea of how to best begin adjusting to this change. He hopes it doesn't last long, maybe he'll be back to his regular self in a minute or an hour or a day but if he doesn't, if this an effect of the potion that lasts longer than he wants, they need to be ready. They can't very well go on avoiding looking at each other just because Spencer's body is different.
He takes Joel's free hand as they kiss, slowly and tenderly as they both part their lips to allow their tongues to meet, and slides his down his body. He squeezes their hands gently over one of his breasts, shivering at the contact as he feels his nipple harden before traveling further down his side, down the soft curve of his normally sharper hips until Joel's hand his resting on his thigh. He can already feel a wetness between his legs, and it's not entirely comfortably because no matter how willing he is to try to make this work for as long as they need to, this still isn't Spencer's body. There's a natural chemistry between them that won't ever go away but being like this means that Joel has to learn him all over again, and Spencer lets out a frustrated moan as they part to catch their breaths.
"Is it too strange?" he asks worriedly, focusing his gaze on Joel's lips just to avoid his husband's eyes because in spite of what he knows to be true about how much they'll always love each other, he's irrationally afraid of what he'll find there. "I want-- Whatever this is, I want us to be okay. I don't care about anything else, I just always want us to be okay."
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He'd meant to tell Joel about the person in the grocery store who'd looked right at him, whose thoughts Spencer had managed to single out because it had been just one word--murderer--before the rest had flooded back in again, but there never seems to be a right time to talk about something like that. It's not even as if Spencer had been surprised that people still think that about him, he knows they do, but to hear is so clearly as if it really had been said out loud had been a jarring experience, and it had made him that much more eager to rid himself of this power.
Right now, though, he's finding that he's glad for it. When this is over--if it ever ends, that is--Spencer will be more than happy to go back to the ordinary man he'd been, the one whose greatest power is rooted in how vehemently he loves his husband, but until then, it helps him relax to know that Joel both wants to touch him but isn't quite sure he'd allowed. He is allowed, of course he is, and in spite of the fact that Spencer doesn't exactly know what to do with the lack of anything between his legs, he thinks he has an idea of how to best begin adjusting to this change. He hopes it doesn't last long, maybe he'll be back to his regular self in a minute or an hour or a day but if he doesn't, if this an effect of the potion that lasts longer than he wants, they need to be ready. They can't very well go on avoiding looking at each other just because Spencer's body is different.
He takes Joel's free hand as they kiss, slowly and tenderly as they both part their lips to allow their tongues to meet, and slides his down his body. He squeezes their hands gently over one of his breasts, shivering at the contact as he feels his nipple harden before traveling further down his side, down the soft curve of his normally sharper hips until Joel's hand his resting on his thigh. He can already feel a wetness between his legs, and it's not entirely comfortably because no matter how willing he is to try to make this work for as long as they need to, this still isn't Spencer's body. There's a natural chemistry between them that won't ever go away but being like this means that Joel has to learn him all over again, and Spencer lets out a frustrated moan as they part to catch their breaths.
"Is it too strange?" he asks worriedly, focusing his gaze on Joel's lips just to avoid his husband's eyes because in spite of what he knows to be true about how much they'll always love each other, he's irrationally afraid of what he'll find there. "I want-- Whatever this is, I want us to be okay. I don't care about anything else, I just always want us to be okay."